Those of us who use internet dating know its many advantages. Thousands of available singles, all at the touch of a mouse click await your inspection. Granted when that first in person meeting comes along you’re bound to be nervous, but hey, you’ve done this before, and you have your nerves firmly in hand. But what about your date?

The fact that your date is nervous can be both charming and frustrating. It’s clear that even though he or she is happy to finally meet you, it’s equally clear that he or she is finding the whole thing a bit overwhelming and intimidating. Which isn’t surprising because you are, after all, totally awesome. But you want them to be relaxed because all those nerves are going to get in the way of getting to know each other.

Usually I approach this head on, in a kind and non critical way. Simply acknowledge that you understand their nervousness and admit that you feel the same way (even if you don’t, it’s kinder this way). Suggest to your date that you both put those feelings aside. Recommend that you both lighten up a bit and have some fun, then lead by example.

With any luck your date will follow your lead and you can get down to the business of dating. But what if your date doesn’t follow suit? Well, you can only do so much. You’re here to have fun not a therapy session. If your date remains cool, don’t be rude about it, but do plan on making it an early night. There’s one of two things happening here; he or she is always cool and reserved, or they just need more time to warm up.

So now that that whole nervy business is out of the way, your date is proceeding smoothly. Or so you thought, until about an hour later when you have concluded that your latest internet dating find is really a jerk!

It’s all a bit mysterious. You know he works with animals and he’s told you lots of stories about his nieces and nephews who love him to pieces, but now that you’ve actually laid eyes on him and have seen the way he treats random strangers; yeah, he’s a jerk. While his emails were sweet and even charming, the way he’s snapping at the waitress and the guy who accidentally bumped into his chair are downright embarrassing.

This is one of those things that you can’t possibly predict from online communication. Sadly, the anger that is currently being directed at others could just as easily be directed at you in the future, and that’s a chance that is just too unsafe to take.

Now this may sound a bit callous but here’s the thing. Dating someone with anger issues is like going to the pet store and buying a puppy or a kitten knowing that it’s already sick. Sure, you can get a healthy one that may develop issues down the road, but at the very least you should shop around until you find the healthiest one possible.

This post was written by the staff of the Datepad.com internet dating company where you can read thousands more professional dating posts.